The word … according to me

By Susan Stone

About a month ago, a dear friend was doing a session with me and he mentioned how much he enjoyed my last article. He went on to say that he noticed how often I quote other people like Nelson Mandela and my teacher, Marian. As though Spirit was speaking directly to me, he asked; “So what is the word according to Susan?

I was stumped. I was speechless, and I had no answer. If you have ever met me, you will know I have an answer for everything. So I knew this was big. I thought I was writing/speaking my truth. I have sat with this question now for over a month and I have had several discussions on this topic with many people whom I consider great teachers. I even called Marian. But no one had the answer I was looking for. And really, how could they? The question was not, “What is the word according to them.” My answer had to come from within.

Have you ever thought about what you really know? Is it possible to even have an original thought? Every morsel of information we have gathered in our brain has come from somewhere else! Our parents taught us first and then our teachers filled our heads full of quotes, facts and philosophy. We extract our knowledge and belief systems from the world, but do we even ask the question: Is it true? Do we pause long enough to run it through our own filters and discern for ourselves the authenticity of the message? Or, do we go with the flow? Do we jump on each other’s band wagons because we want to belong to something greater than ourselves?

Finding your own still and quiet voice is not as easy as it sounds, and yet it is. The key here is being still and quiet. This does not come naturally for me. I am compelled to do, to work, to create. Sitting still is for people who eat brown rice. And yet, it is always in stillness that I find my answers and my peace.

I was taught to keep the peace from the time I was able to talk. We were not to rock the boat in my house. No one cared what a child had to say, nor were they interested in how we felt about any given situation. I was raised in a “children are to be seen and not heard” sort of household. So from the start, I was taught to “stuff” whatever unpleasant feelings I had back inside where it wouldn’t make anyone else feel uncomfortable. When I grew older, I became the ultimate diplomat. I have counseled and refereed so many disputes over the years, it sort of astonishes me.  I have been known as a peacemaker for as long as I can remember.

My fuse is so long that it gives people the impression that they can say anything, or do anything to me and I won’t get angry and I won’t run away. I will stay and resolve any transgression with as much love as I can muster. And if the relationship cannot be repaired or the conflict cannot be resolved, I send them off with my blessing and wish them a happy life.

Well, this was not the case yesterday! I guess I was tired. I need a root canal. I haven’t been able to eat for two weeks and I’m hungry! So the perfect storm presented itself, and I blew. Not just angry, I came unhinged and lost complete control of myself. I screamed and yelled and wore myself out!

Boy, did that feel good. I have been holding this particular thing inside for far too long. I was angry and I stopped pretending that I wasn’t. I felt so relieved! I finally spoke the word (plus a few four letter words) according to me. And you know what? The world did not end.

So, what is the word … according to you?

You can find Susan Stone at Beaufort Chiropractic. She is an Intuitive healer, Reiki Master, minister and counselor. Author of “We Heard You,” available on Amazon.com You may contact Susan at theriverangel.ss@gmail.com.

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