The Life and Times of don David de la Hacienda de los Pelicanos


Chapter 4: The Bitter Taste of Retribution

By David Taub

There they stood, Jazabel and an unnamed young man, like stone statues from Easter Island, staring contemptuously down at A3, who was the only member of don David’s army present there. Before Jazabel could open her mouth, her young man friend, copped a nasty attitude, and began a barrage of loudly delivered insults direct at A3.

“You are an old fool. Don’t you know who you are messing with? This family has lots of influence in Merida. You are about to find yourself in deep kimshi, my old friend! Best you return Señorita Jazabel’s business post haste and remove yourselves immediately!”

In the voice of a gentleman that defines A3, he replied, “Young man, let me tell you about ‘influence.’ I suggest that you go down to the Sakh-beyh cenote, just a short walk behind you. Insert your arm into its magical water, up to your arm-pit; quickly remove your arm. The size of the hole you leave in those crystal waters is the amount of influence you and Señor Zero and Señorita Jazabel have. Get my drift, sonny-boy?”

The young man stood frozen, mouth clamped shut. Señorita Jazabel quickly took command from this impish fool.

“Forgive my foolish friend; he sometimes lets his mouth take control of his brain,” she said quietly. “We have come to get my belongings. I have lots of money in property here—my clothes, food, alcohol, furniture. These things belong to me. Please, this is all I have, and I would like to have it back quickly,” she pleaded.

By now, other members of don David’s army had arrived at the gate. A3 dismissed them, wising to deal with the dreaded duo himself.

He said simply, “We shall be delighted to return your property, as you clearly understand you have no right to be here or to use this hacienda, which belongs to don David.”

She nodded her head in agreement.

“However, you must present papers, receipts, documents that prove that which you ask for in fact belongs to you,” A3 said. “Upon demonstrating your ownership, we shall be pleased to hand-over what you allege belongs to you.”

“I understand,” said Jazabel haltingly, “but please can you let me have my clothes?”

He agreed, and shortly Fernando brought out several boxes of clothes, some of which were men’s clothes. Fernando told A3 that Jazabel frequently had different male visitors at the hacienda. Remember those gossiping villagers?

A3 and Jazabel agreed that in one week’s time, Jazabel would return early that day, with the required documents to retrieve her belongings. A3 assigned the task of dealing with Jazabel to attorney C2, who was an expert in such matters.

A week later, on the appointed day, attorney C2 arrived early; alas, Jazabel never appeared. And since that time, no communication of any kind has taken place with the complaining and “highly influential” liars.

Perhaps Jazabel or Señor Zero did not know the Mexican law that reads that if someone does not remove their belongings from someone else’s property within 90 days, the property shall belong to the other party. As of this writing, already 45 days have elapsed. Time sprints onward.

With Los Bastardos in the rearview mirror, things at the hacienda began to change in a major way. Don David, A3 and the guru of tourism, NN, created an LLC company, to continue operating the B&B, bar/restaurant. It took time to accomplish this in accordance with the Mexican law, something Señor Zero and Jazabel never did. Remember Mexican Axiom No. 2.

Rumors flew through Yucatán like western wildfires in the U.S. Soon, NN began to receive requests from clients, and the business took off as word of “new management” reached curious ears. Families began to appear, to eat, swim in the magical waters of the hacienda’s cenote, and to stay in the renovated apartments. Yippie!

Don David enjoyed being a gringo businessman in Yucatán. Curiously, nothing more was heard from Los Bastardos.

A3 asked his coterie of other attorneys to investigate further. They discovered/uncovered that there was an arrest warrant pending on Señor Zero, but he seems to have disappeared again.

Jazabel had moved in with her mother, who left Señor Zero after the car accident in which his alleged mistress was killed. Attorney C2 met with the aggrieved widower and they went to the “county’s” attorney general to seek redress from Señor Zero for the wrongful death of his former wife.

If Los Bastardos thought they could intimidate don David and A3, they have now come to understand that their zapatos are now on the other foot. The telenovela of Los Bastardos are stories for another time.

The tale of the Life and Times of don David now comes to a happy end. Don David has possession of his cherished hacienda and he is now a successfully gringo businessman in Yucatán. Many important upgrades to the property have been made. Life is good in the environs of Los Pelicanos.

So now, my friends, we must end the saga of don David and La Hacienda de los Pelicanos. I hope you have enjoyed the four episodes of his telenovela. Saludos a todos de don David.

“Well, all I know is what I read in the newspapers.” – Will Rogers. 

David M. Taub was Mayor of Beaufort from 1990 through 1999 and served as a Beaufort County Magistrate from 2010 to 2015. You can reach him at david.m.taub42@gmail.com.

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