Weekend Crime Reports

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THE ANT AND THE CRICKET: Last Friday proved quite the remix to the famous “The Ant and The Cricket” Aesop fable. An unknown subject broke into an unoccupied residence between 8 a.m. and 6:30 p.m. and stole approximately $4,ooo in electronics and jewelry. Now that is a lot of electronics and jewelry. While one poor honest ant works all day, another cricket steals all his goods, reaping the benefits of the other’s hard work. I guess in this story the cricket stays very entertained over the winter.

 

SUPER LIQUID COURAGE: Last Saturday around 2 a.m. when the bars downtown closed, an intoxicated subject walked up to a couple of officers and tried to intervene as the cops were in the process of giving a stopped car a traffic violation. “Just who, hiccup, do you think you guys are?” Unfortunately, the subject’s super hero drunkenness neither helped the traffic violation victims nor his case. He was arrested for public drunkenness.

 

KNOCK, KNOCK: Who’s there? An unknown male subject running away from your door. A resident was watching TV at 10:15 p.m. when he heard someone knock on his door and jiggle the door handle. It’s one thing for kids to play Ding Dong Dash in the day and frustrate the heck out of some adult, but it’s an entirely creepy when adults play it at night.

 

THE LOUD & THE FURIOUS: Last Saturday around 10 p.m. an officer attempted to pull over a vehicle that was blasting loud music. Apparently “loud and unseemly” is a crime. This particular driver, however, either felt guilty about something else or felt like taking on the officer for an elite street race. The vehicle took off at a high speed and was later found crashed into an apartment building at Marsh Point—amateur. He or she could learn a thing or two about drifting from Vin Diesel.

 

Compiled by Tess Malijenovsky. Crime Blotter items are chosen from the files of the Beaufort Police Department. Please contact the police with any insider information on these cases.