Back to school, back to reality

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By Terry Manning

This is advice I give students who ask me about getting into college, staying in college, and graduating from college. They can help you be successful in other areas too.

First, show up.

If you’re supposed to be somewhere, be there. If it’s time for class, be in class. If it’s a study session, be in that study session. If it’s an internship, be at the internship. I promise you, professors react a lot differently to a student who shows up than to a student who hasn’t been seen since the first week of class.

I remember a professor who said a student who had disappeared on him, and hadn’t turned in a single assignment, came to his office the last week of the Spring semester and asked, “What can I do to pass this class?”

He threw up his hands and said, “It’s May!”

The student thought about it and then asked, “Well, what may I do to pass this class?”

The professor said, “Take it again this fall.”

So show up, and when you show up …

Second, do the work. 

There is no substitute for effort. Read the book, write the paper, take the quiz. You can let artificial intelligence review your homework before you turn it in, but make sure you have some real knowledge to give it.

You might think you can make up for all the missed assignments before the end of the semester, but if you couldn’t find time to do them in the previous 14 weeks, how do you plan to do it all in the final week of classes while you’re trying to catch up on all the work you didn’t do in your other classes, and while you’re trying to prepare for finals?

If you want to try that, you’re braver than I am. Or crazier. But do the work. Turn in something. Get partial credit, at least. Never take a zero.

Third, take care of yourself. 

This includes your mind, your body, and your soul.

For your mind? Read. Don’t just sit in front of a computer screen watching, scrolling, and clicking. READ. You’d be amazed at what you find in a book that you won’t find on Instagram or TikTok.

You can find useful information on social media, but their algorithms are designed to steal your time, not feed your mind.

For your body? Eat healthy foods. Eat healthy amounts. Get up and move. Drink plenty of water. And get plenty of rest.

For your soul? Be positive. Try to keep a good attitude and be around people who have good attitudes and are trying to do things with their lives.

Don’t take a zero, and don’t hang around people with zero ambition.

For your soul, find a church. Around many colleges and universities, churches have ministries that cater to college students. Sometimes that means special events, sometimes it’s an early service or a late service, and sometimes it’s offering a hot meal for Sunday dinner because they know the dining hall is closed on weekends.

Number four, know when it’s time to go. 

Sometimes you are going to find yourself in places you don’t belong. You might not know why, but you will have a feeling that tells you.

In high school, I went to a classmate’s house party, and as soon as I stepped inside, the whole room froze. I don’t know who said it, but I remember hearing someone say, “There’s the narc.” 

I was not a narcotics agent.

When somebody said, “They got pot in the kitchen,” I went in and looked on the stovetop. I didn’t see anything cooking, so I turned and left.

I was in a room full of people I knew, and some I wanted to know, but I wasn’t part of their circle. Everybody wants to belong, but sometimes you just don’t. There are some places you don’t need to be, and you need to know when it’s time to go

Number five, find your people.

The best thing about finding out where you don’t belong is finding out where you do belong and who is in that space with you. So if you like to read, write, take pictures, enjoy comic books, play music, do fashion — whatever — there is a community out there for you.

FOMO, fear of missing out, is a real thing nowadays, but maybe you won’t be so fearful about what other people are doing if you are with people who like to do the things that you enjoy.

YOLO, you only live once, is true, and wouldn’t you rather spend time with people who are of a like mind? People who don’t ask you to compromise who you are and what you believe just to fit in?

I pray you read something that makes a difference for you. And in the end, that’s all anybody can hope for in this life: to make a difference.

Terry E. Manning is a Clemson graduate and worked for 20 years as a journalist. He can be reached at teemanning@gmail.com.

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